Q: What's the main difference between intelligence and ignorance?
A: I don't know and I don't care!
Q: What is the longest word in the English language?
A: "Smiles". Because there is a mile between its first and last letters!
Q: What's the definition of a pessimist?
A: A pessimist is a well-informed optimist.
Q: Why did the bald man paint rabbits on his head?
A: Because from a distance they looked like hares!
Marital bliss.
Charles was getting annoyed and shouted upstairs to his wife,
" Hurry up or we'll be late."
"Oh, be quiet," replied his wife. "Haven't I been telling you for the last hour that I'll be ready in a minute?"
Down the hatch!
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